Mixed feeling

Confused.

Ever since friday, i've been so confused. Don't even know what i'm thinking.. Celebrated someone's birthday, someone that once mean the world to me. Yes i admit i was happy because it's been like almost a year since we last talk so much, the only time i remembered us talking is before we broke up. And it's like a year plus alr.. Obviously i'm happy . And because of that, i'm so afraid.. afraid things will turn bad. So afraid that the feeling will come back.. I used so much time to get over you, get over everything. I'm not gonna let myself go back . I won't look back. 7 months of holding on, acting strong,trying . No more, no more .
At the other hand, i've been waiting for this guy for 6 months plus. He don't even feel anything at all . Sometimes i feel that i mean something but sometimes i feel like nothing to him.